We were tearing up the pool parties and raving with Tinie Tempah

Most people’s relationship with their mum only extends to a bit of shopping and, at a stretch, a few cocktails – but I went to the biggest party island in the Balearics with mine.

Leaving Dad at home, we spent five days in Playa d’en Bossa in Ibiza. Our hotel was next to big name clubs like Ushuaia and Space, and it definitely made a difference to our usual family holiday. Having been to Marbs with just my mum once before, I knew what to expect. On big family holidays we usually hit up the fancy up market beach clubs and go a bit wild, so I was already used to partying with my parents in the sun.

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Bithaaaaa

As soon as we arrived at our hotel, the questions began and they didn’t seem to stop. Are you mother and daughter? Are you sisters? No one could work out our relationship, or why exactly we’d come to Europe’s party capital for a holiday. From bartender to restaurant server, it appeared to be quite a surprise mother and daughter had travelled to Ibiza together. Little did they know my mum is the biggest legend going, and she was there to teach them all a thing or two about how to party. 

There were a number of older couples at the beach clubs and quite a lot of old men, but at both Ushuaia and Ocean Beach I didn’t come across anyone who was out with just their mum or dad. We were making heads turn everywhere we went. Servers at some of the tapas bars were very attentive. At one very busy restaurant we had three servers waiting on us, and they’d loiter and smile while we ate, making jokes about us being sisters. It was all very uncomfortable.

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What a babe

On our second day, we travelled to San Antonio for Ocean Beach Club’s Ministry of Sound party. The majority of their crowd were in their early 20s and sadly, I didn’t spot anyone there having a boogie with their mother: clearly doing it wrong. At times I did feel a bit awkward as there were always big groups of people around my age on holiday, but at the end of the day I was there to enjoy myself and have fun with my mum.

We enjoyed a bottle over lunch accompanied by some absolute R&B classics. My mum even befriended one of the employees at the club, Donald. Unfortunately this new found friendship didn’t amount to any free drinks.

Bit close, Donald?

Bit close, Donald?

Walking along the beach after dinner one evening we stumbled across a party. Heels in hand and tipsy from dinner, we decided to join the fun. Mum put other party revellers to shame by getting up and dancing on one of the few sun loungers. Thankfully she was hardly visible due to the poorly lit alfresco set up. As mush as I’d like to say she embarrasses me, I think it’s fair to say we probably embarrass each other.

Half way through the holiday, Mum spotted Tinie Tempah waiting for a taxi at our hotel. It was embarrassing she was the one who spotted him, and not me – even though I’m surrounded by his music every time I turn on the radio, and see his face all over the magazines. She went over in an instant and having complimented him on his recent appearance on the Graham Norton Show, managed to get a few pics with the star. They chatted and laughed away while I stood there thinking about how my mum became so cool.

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Best friends

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Mum having a boogie

On our last day we decided to go big, and book tickets for Ushuaia’s infamous Ants party. Mum had been recommended the club by her friends who had been out the previous week (is middle aged women going on clubbing holidays a new thing?). Most people there appeared to be in their own worlds, two-stepping to progressive house and guzzling down €9 bottles of water.

My mum and I both awkwardly witnessed a few partygoers pour baggies containing mysterious white powder into their drinks. Again she was more ahead of the game than me, saying “I think that’s ecstasy isn’t it?”. We turned a blind eye and danced the evening away, before having to catch our flight home in the early hours.

Although mother-daughter party holidays are rare, it was really good fun. We’re currently discussing a joint 21st and 50th for next year. Full Moon Party maybe?

@cydneyac

  • Anonymous

    What a battyplayer

    • Badmandunknow

      You fancy a spliff?

  • Le Post Peeker

    This is a very nice post. l’m glad I peeked at it!

  • drugs or not

    I don’t understand and the moral of this story

  • Anonymous

    Batty boy

  • yo

    this is a really good article but it feels like it ends mid way through the story

  • Lou

    This same thing happened to me and it sucked!

  • I don’t get it

    Soooo what? If your mom didn’t think you should have sex before marriage and you told her you had should she make you feel guilty for that? Open your eyes; your mom is just manipulating you based on her own opinions whether she means to or not

  • wut

    jeez what a whiny little brat, oh boo hoo my mum doesnt like me taking drugs now my life is ruined

  • Avid recreational drug user

    You could just continue taking drugs, but not tell her

  • Absolutely

    tragic

  • anon

    “I either have to be that awkward drunk friend on a completely different level to everyone else or just leave early.” aka you’re one of those idiots who ruins good nights by going for the drugs rather than the music

  • Reuben

    I wish more middle aged people understood how safe drugs are.

  • Badmandunknow

    Fake and Gay

  • Jellballz

    must suck having a mum who wants the best for you, especially if she’s protecting you from drugs that could kill you (if your taking something you can only describe as ‘pills’ then you’re asking for trouble). I really feel for you. At least you can learn from her mistakes and not care if your kids take drugs. Man those will be some lucky kids.

    • Hmmm

      I don’t think its about being mad or disappointed that your kids have taken drugs. Its about education and making them realise the costs of their actions. People will always be curious, its just about being sensible.

  • Alexander Shulgin

    you didn’t do anything wrong at all. In fact you were probably being more responsible and doing less harm to yourself than the beer boys or the chardonnay chicks. Remember that! Try to educate your mum instead.

  • What

    badly written and pointless article, lacking any clear message or conclusion. your mum knowing shouldn’t really affect your decision making to such a drastic extent, fair take her advice, but it sounds like she’s not really in the best position to tell you what’s right and wrong. and in general, you can party with or without drugs and alcohol, so stop being an awkward speng and have a good time. or find better nights to go to that aren’t so heavily reliant on drugs

  • meh

    man up and get over it

  • What

    as if you were actually going to lie to your parents as well. drugs/alcohol take as much as they give, if you’re cool with that keep going, if not don’t. it shouldn’t really be some awkward guilt trip that determines your decision making

  • U-U-U-OB

    Lets be honest though, she was disappointed in you because you’re at Nottingham.

  • Anonymous

    Either drugs are something casual or they’re not. If you’d explained to your mum in a level-headed way that yes, you’d been taking recreational drugs but you’re using them sensibly, are aware of the risks and only didn’t tell her because you didn’t want her to worry, then maybe she’d see you as an adult who had made some adult decisions.

    Instead, by making a huge fuss about how you’re entitled to take drugs without your bitch of a mum being understandably worried about you (gasp, scandalous!), you’re only making matters worse by acting like a very young child who has no idea what she’s doing (i.e. to your mum, more likely to die a horrible drug-related death).

    Generally by university, people are mature enough to realise that their parents are people with feelings and emotions, just like them. Unfortunately, you are obviously so caught up in how edgy and daring you are doing drugs that you’re still looking for something to rebel against in order to keep up your delusions of grandeur.

    Basically, grow the fuck up and remember that the universe doesn’t literally revolve around you and the fact that you enjoy taking drugs.

    • paulius

      Fucking this. This article is the most self-indulgent piece of crap I’ve ever read. Cocaine is a highly dangerous substance, and all you’re worried about is that your mum’s concerned that it might kill you and wants you to stop. It’s also seriously worrying that you believe it isn’t possible to have a good time without drugs- get help.

      BTW, I regularly take coke and E, but I don’t act like i’s some god given right

  • Tom s-c

    literally give a fuck what your mum thinks. you’re over 18 for fuck sake. it’s your life and you can do what you bloody well want. most of our parents did do drugs back in the day. my father was a heroin addict for 7 years, whilst my mother enjoyed a more psychedelic experience. so it is utterly hypocritical of them to get angry with us.
    i cannot believe you made yourself just drink at outlook because of talking to your mum, that is utterly pathetic. i’m assuming your mother wasn’t there chaperoning you?!
    my mother knows about my drug use and we talk openly about it, which i think is the best approach as it takes away the “rebel-against-your-parents” aspect and therefore is less likely to lead to addiction. my father on the other hand i’m pretty sure knows I take drugs but because of his very narrow-minded new wife it is a taboo subject.
    at the end of the day, it is YOUR body. do whatever the fuck you want. don’t make your life miserable because of guilt that you think you should be feeling towards your parents.
    be more independent. that’s why i’m glad i went to boarding school.

    • Alex

      you sound like a cunt, spare a thought that every family is not like your own

    • Student

      What is ‘utterly pathetic’ is the fact that you think it is entirely necessary to take drugs at a festival. Please do the world a favour and grow up.

      • Flavia

        I think he means it was pathetic that she made herself miserable at outlook, whilst obviously all her friends were taking drugs. This is her own fault and nobody else’s, her mother can’t stop her taking drugs.

  • concerned

    get new friends

  • mmmmmmm

    lol at least you won’t get organ failure and die now that you’re not snorting brick dust

  • madmanlikemandy

    After graduating with a 1st in engineering, I told my mum that i’ve been doing drugs throughout my uni time on a weekly basis. She probably knew it all along anyway she didn’t really say much about it..